Reframing The Good Old Days
Sunset over Bohicket Marina on John's Island, SC. Just one of my good old days.
Dear Izzy, Max, and Kate,
Over the last few months I’ve told you a lot about “good old days” in my life. There were the dedicated days a wrestler. The freedom and reckless abandon of the college years. The blissful early years of marriage when we traveled alot and lived on the island. The hot year I worked on boats at Bohicket Marina feeling connected to the ocean. The early years of my triathlon career when I thought anything was possible. Just to name a few.
Those were good times.
Recently though I was struck by a song lyric that seems to be sticking with me. It’s from Pat Green’s “All the good things fade away“.
Here it is, uncensored, because that’s how Pat wrote it and honestly, this is how I feel it:
Sure seems shitty to me there has to be such a thing as the good old days.
Hearing that caused me to reconsider how I view life as it happens. Times are hard for us as a family some days. Not in a financial sense, but more in a growing pains kind of way. Mommy and I struggle sometimes to manage 3 young kids. I certainly don’t always do it with Grace. And, I suppose I occasionally think about the “good old days” and wonder about how life goes so quickly. One day I’m washing boats, drinking a beer, and watching the sun set over the Atlantic. Then in a blink of the eye I’m 12 years deep into an office life with a house full of kids. It’s easy to think back and say “man, those were the good old days.”
The truth is, if I think hard enough about any of those good old days I realize I’m only remembering the highlight reel images. Working on boats was great, but I stayed sunburnt, earned minimum wage (maybe a little better), and was constantly talked down to by wealthy tourists and boat owners who assumed I was an uneducated marina rat because I chose to fill their boats with gas. Now, the good of working on the ocean certainly outweighs the bad, but it wasn’t always a Jimmy Buffett song. Usually, but not always.
I know one day when you kids are grown I’ll look back and remember these days as the good old days too. You kids still innocent and playing in the backyard, me and mommy the center of your universe, and each other as your best friends. It won’t always be this way. So while I get angry about bedtime, messes, and constant crying and fighting, I know one day I’ll wish I had it all back.
So here’s how Pat Green finishes out that thought:
Sure seems shitty to me there has to be such a thing as the good old days
Someday, somewhere, my hair like my memories will all just fade out to gray
Got it all right now and I just as soon keep it that way
I love you critters,
– Daddy
quote of the day: Max is turning into a philosopher. You said: “The tractor is my ocean.” That’s heavy son. You love tractors.
Training: recovery week
Monday: REST
Tuesday: REST
Things always seem better when looked back on. We are good editors. Sometimes I have to remind myself to appreciate the now.
One of my favorite sayings about the good old days:
“The only difference between good old days and today is that you know the outcome of the good old days”.
Don’t bother Googling it, I made it up about four years ago, but it works.
Bro. didn’t mean to laugh when we talked on the steps on the way into work. In my mind I was thinking about different stages of life we are all experiencing. Last night Patti and I were lamenting over how quiet it was in the house. It was nice but we were feeling kinda sad and talking about how fast life goes. When I read your blog post today a song that dates me a little jumped into my mind. It kinda dates me.
Bro. I did not mean to laugh when we were talking on the steps on the way into work this morning. But it was running through my mind the stages of life each of us are experiencing. Last night Patti and I were lamenting over how quiet the house is at night and how quickly it seems time has gone. A song popped into my head that kinda dates me and somewhat applies to what we are talking about. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NwP3wes4M8&feature=relmfu
Bruce, this is perfect. Thanks! This is why I lean on you as one of my life mentors. You’ve been to the places I’m living in and survived!
From Bruce’s link: Carly Simon’s “Anticipation”:
We can never know about the days to come
But we think about them anyway, yay
And I wonder if I’m really with you now
Or just chasin’ after some finer day
Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin’ me late
Is keepin’ me waitin’
And I tell you how easy it feels to be with you
And how right your arms feel around me
But I, I rehearsed those lines just late last night
When I was thinkin’ about how right tonight might be
Anticipation, anticipation
Is makin’ me late
Is keepin’ me waitin’
And tomorrow we might not be together
I’m no prophet and I don’t know nature’s ways
So I’ll try and see into your eyes right now
And stay right here ’cause these are the good old days
(These are the good old days)
And stay right here ’cause these are the good old days
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are the good old days)
(These are…..the good old days)
Your kids’ good ol’ days are right now! At least, my happiest times were in the mid to late ’80s, when I was just a bit older than they are now. Just live vicariously through them!